What now? Where to?


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I’ve said goodbye to many people, those drive-by impostors who come bearing fruits:warnings and lessons.

I’ve said goodbye without a wave, a note or song. As they escaped down my cheeks, washing away parts of me I should have cherished and valued.

Sifting through an old Facebook profile, unused for over 3 years, I clicked and erased, clicked and erased those I wish to forget. I can’t recall why I opened that door, where they could step freely into my space. A space I hold dear, but they see not as sacred.
I lost my job today! Yep! One of the greatest fears of my life I’m facng, single parent of two and jobless. Already I sense what I built crumbling around me! That 401k I cherished! The credit score I built and strived for. They made me proud, thinking some way, somehow I was providing, protecting us. Capable!
I, facing my fears but I can’t run away. I dare not cry, or crumble. But tonight, tonight I need to say goodbye, to potential, to the past, to who I was. Each time I felt it was erecting a foundation for a better tomorrow, it turned to naught. Oh the potentials! The possible friends! The longed for lovers!

Tomorrow is mayday, boots strapped, belt tightened kinda day.

But tonight….

Tonight is for goodbye!img_4791

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