Are you okay? Hmm

“Are you okay?”

Yes and no.

I will be though. If there’s breath it should right? So we think. When there’s not, it is the end, we believe.

Why do you ask if I’m okay when you don’t even have time to listen, truly listen to the response? Why do we keep asking questions we don’t care to have the answers to?

Should I give the usual response? Or should I tell you all that’s wrong? One would say it would depend on who’s asking. But no, it depends on the question. We should respond truthfully to the question.

“Are you okay dear Sir, Ms., Ma’am? Are you?”

Do we ask because it is the norm? Do we ask out of curiosity or do we really care?

Often I find myself unable to answer. So many questions to that one question especially when it is followed by “I haven’t seen you or heard from you in a while. Is everything okay?”

Duh! I think. And then I feel. It’s a test. He’s testing my emotions, wondering where they fall. But they run the gamut. I’m asked to take the temperature of my emotional state. Is it running hot or cold? Maybe lukewarm?

Always blunt, wondering more than I should, I think “if you really cared you would have reached out sooner or maybe not lost touch at all. That makes sense to me. I check on those I care about and if you don’t hear from me, well I have probably explained at length why you will not be hearing from me. No need therefore to wonder if I am okay. Feel me?” That would be too much to say would it not? It will most likely be followed by an offense more often then a defense if they really wish to connect and lastly a judgement “you always complicate things. I was just checking up on you.” I dislike repeating the same arguments, discussions that lead nowhere. Been there, done that blah blah blah!
” “I am. How are you? Hope you’re doing well.” Politeness without follow through that could lead to trivial arguments.

“Awww so sweet of you. How are you?” You’re still on a sweet note in my head and I’m being polite. There’s no negative attachment to your name there.

“”Who is this?” You’re not important, I have erased you totally if it’s a text you sent. Or “hmm is that so?” Or simply “hmmmmm hello.” Or a no response at all. If we are face to face and you’re wasting my time with nonsense acting as if you give a damn to know I have been when you never bothered before.

Too busy is the lie that covers I don’t care to make an effort.

Doesn’t take much to show we care. A simple hello here and there, a happy birthday or card. If we have lost touch, we chose to. You aren’t valued enough to be kept abreast of my ongoing.

Am I okay? You will know when you’re present.”

“I live for the highs I can’t remember in the places I’ll never forget!